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"Won’t Ever Be Anywhere But Here" | mark/wardo

Pairing: Mark/Eduardo

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: 2,151

Warnings: graphic mansex, naughty language

Summary: Eduardo is a dick.

Author’s Note: Well. Here it is. This is me getting my little ~pornographic feelers~ out. Wow, they look like penises! First porny thing to submit to the ‘thon. After the last one I felt like dirtying it up. The title is based on “Stutter” by Marianas Trench which is also AWESOME and yes, I am using the ‘thon to promote my favorite bands, SHHHHHHHHHHH.

“You’re a dick,” Mark says.

Eduardo laughs like it’s still funny even though he’s heard it a million times before.

“What, just because I’m going out with my girlfriend tomorrow night instead of sitting here—like every other day of the week, by the way—and watching you code?”

“I’m glad that you understand. It gets daunting to repeat myself all the time.” Mark hears Chris snort from the living room, probably because everything always sounds funnier from Mark’s mouth. It must be because he has no concern for the emotional wellbeing of others—and even if he did, he still doesn’t understand what can and can’t be said to other people in social situations.

“I think you’ll find it in yourself to forgive me,” says Eduardo, turning back to his Econ textbook.

Mark is going to slap him in the face and it is going to feel really, really good. Frankly, he’s had it coming for a long time.

Wardo pays less attention to Facebook than he does to Mark, and that alone is a miniscule amount. Mark wants to be envied and revered for what he’s doing—especially by Eduardo, because, like, isn’t that his job?—but he just pokes fun and pinches cheeks, and he’s never around. It’s annoying.

Wardo’s legs are crossed, and his feet peek out from under his thighs.

“Your socks don’t match,” Mark points out, and that’s annoying, too. If Wardo is going to insist on wearing business attire all the time, couldn’t he at least pick out socks that were the same goddamned color?

Wardo tears his gaze away from his studying to inspect the gray foot and the navy foot, and Mark is infuriated, because how could Wardo give his full attention to his socks but not to his best friend?

Wardo shrugs and takes a swig from his beer. Mark takes the opportunity to stand up from the couch, stride over, and pluck the bottle from his fingers. “This beer is reserved for the loyal and dedicated staff members of Facebook. You can have some as soon as you decide that this project means as much to you as it does to the rest of us.”

Wardo tries to protest, but Mark is already in the kitchen, dumping the remnants of the beer into the sink. Now everyone in Kirkland is whining, because that was completely good beer, Mark, how could you do that, Mark, why, why, why.

It’s too late. Mark is in one of his ‘moods’, and nothing is going to pull him out of it except eight straight hours of coding and a lot of Red Bull. He grabs a six-pack from the fridge, picks up his laptop from the sofa and walks past Chris, Eduardo, and Dustin—nearly in tears over ‘the only thing he ever loved’—and into his room. He slams the door behind him.

This happens a lot. Mark picks fights with Eduardo whenever he can, like he won’t walk into his room later, after Chris and Dustin have left for AEPi, and give him that look. Suddenly everything that Eduardo has ever said or done is not of consequence. And yeah, Mark gets pissed about it, because just a flash of those eyes and Wardo’s forgiven, and that’s not fair at all, right?

He’ll shed his blazer on the floor and Mark will give up any shred of fight that he may have, because Eduardo will lean over him and press him into the bed, kissing him until his lips are numb and his fingers throb from fisting Eduardo’s shirt too tightly. He’ll press the line of his cock into Mark’s hip, another dirty trick, because Mark can’t help but press back into it and groan into Wardo’s mouth. Mark will feel his smile and hate him for it.

They’ll tug and tear at each other’s clothing. Maybe Mark will pop a button off Eduardo’s shirt because he’ll get fussy, and Eduardo will pout about it later. He’ll be too busy struggling with Mark’s sweatpants to worry about it.

“Mark, lift your ass.” And that moment will be when Mark feels the most satisfied, because Eduardo will be losing it over a big piece of polyester-cotton blend. He’ll smirk and shift as slowly as possible until they’re finally pooled at his ankles, and Wardo will literally tear them from his feet and throw them across the room.

Mark will feel the slow drag of Wardo’s lips on the inside of his leg, tracing a birthmark on his thigh. He’ll shiver because Wardos’ lips are ridiculously soft, and it’ll make him want those lips on other places, like his cock, and he’s so close that it’s hard not to imagine.

Wardo will tease him for a while until he’s writhing, long rivulets of sweat running down the back of his neck and he’ll whine Wardo because it’s hot, too hot. Wardo will sigh and move back up, helping him peel off of his shirt. He’ll look at Mark’s expression and groan, because he will look so fucked: all red cheeks and bitten lips. Then he’ll decide he’s done with games. He’ll slide back down his body and peel off Mark’s underwear, slipping his cock between his lips and swallowing him whole.

Mark won’t be used to this. He’ll never be used to this. In any other situation, Wardo is meticulous and intelligent in everything that he says, but in the bedroom, he puts that mouth to other uses. Mark likes the sound of Wardo’s voice, but he thinks that he likes it better when it’s rumbling around the girth of his cock.

Mark’s thighs will shake because when Wardo goes down on him he likes to sit and savor for an eternity, just keeping Mark in the deep, wet, tight suction of his mouth. At this point Mark will be hard enough that it hurts, and he just wants to get off now, please now, and he’ll beg and tug on Wardo’s meticulously styled hair until it’s a mess.

Wardo will probably feel bad for him and press the head of his thumb against Mark’s entrance. At this point he’ll want to scream because it’s not even close to being enough, but Wardo will pull off with those fucking wet-as-fuck cocksucker lips and say “come for me, Mark” and press the rest of this thumb inside. It’ll be some sort of miracle, but Mark will, he will; and it’ll be wet and amazing and exactly what he needs all over his stomach and Wardo’s hands and his cheek.

Wardo will smile and wipe it off with his finger and pop it into his mouth. Mark will barely catch the swirl of his pink tongue, and already he’ll be ready to go again.

But Wardo’s different. He won’t have come yet, but he’ll let himself savor it: he’ll comb his fingers through Mark’s hair and apologize for dragging it out, if he hurt him at all. Mark will bat his hands away and insist that he’s fine, really, and he’d be even better if Eduardo would just shove something in his ass: his dick, preferably.

Eduardo will just laugh at him and press a kiss to his forehead. Wait, he’ll say. If I can, so can you.

Wardo makes him spoon with him. His arms are long and warm. So is his dick, still hard and pressing insistently against his back. If Mark tries to move to provide any sort of friction, Wardo will clamp down and make him stay still.

It will be awful and wonderful at the same time. Wardo will smell like sex and come and faintly like the cologne he put on that morning. Mark will hate him. He will hate him with every fiber of his being, because he makes him come and then hugs him afterwards. He’ll press butterfly kisses against the nape of Mark’s neck that’ll make him shiver. He’ll rest his chin against his shoulder and talk about his day, and Mark won’t be bored. Mark will hate him because all of those things must mean that he has unexpectedly found a person that means something to him.  And he won’t know how to show it.

It’ll be annoying as shit.

Finally Eduardo will lay back which means that Mark is allowed to finish what they started. He’ll grab a condom and roll it on. Wardo will hand him the lube and he’ll spread it over the head of his cock, causing Wardo to make short little panting noises. Mark’s hands will be slippery and Wardo will be thrusting messily between his fingers. It will be the hottest thing that Mark has ever seen.

Wardo will try to stop him when he leans up and presses the head of his cock at his entrance, saying wait, wait, Mark, no, it’ll hurt because he won’t be prepared at all, but Mark won’t care. He will promise that he’ll be fine, that he wants it to burn, and Wardo’s eyes will practically roll into the back of his head because that is so hot.

Mark will slowly sink down, bearing down on Wardo’s cock. They’ll both be strung ridiculously tight. Wardo will have his fingers digging into Mark’s asscheeks, leaving angry purple half-moons on the white of his skin. Mark’s chest will heave and his fingers will scramble for purchase on Wardo’s shoulders, because it will burn and the stretch will be ridiculous and so good and it will be even better if Eduardo will just ram his hips up inside and fuck him

His thighs will shake as he slowly rises and falls back down again, taking trembling breaths that get cut off when Eduardo fucks up and catches him off guard. I want you so bad, Mark will cry, want you, want  you, please just fuck me harder, need it deeper, and Eduardo will growl and rake his nails down his spine and push.

It’ll be awesome. With every moment that Mark will sink down Wardo will push up and in and he’ll cry out and ride him harder and Eduardo will grab him that much tighter. They’ll kiss and taste each other’s sweat and Eduardo will push his tongue inside and swallow the desperate sounds trying to escape from Mark’s lips.

Mark will roll his hips and Wardo will tell him to do it again because it’s good, fuck it’s so, so good, Mark. He’ll tell him again and again against the skin of his neck, sucking hard and biting deep and Mark will moan because there’s no way that he’ll be able to hide a bruise like that.

Wardo will grab Mark’s cock when he least expects it and slide it tight between the space of his fingers, and at this point they’ll both be desperately hard. Mark will slam down as hard as he possibly can, groaning at the sound of skin slapping against skin, and Wardo will just jerk him off as best as he knows how, because he wants Mark to come—all over me, Mark, come on, amor, I want it—and Mark won’t be able to hold out for long.

Wardo will thumb the underside, run a nail along the head and Mark will shudder, spurting long and hard, coating their chests and stomachs with come. Wardo won’t have come, though, so Mark will fuck himself through his orgasm, whining with oversensitivity but loving it. There will be hands all over his body: Wardo trying to map him as well as he can through his building climax.

Mark will lean down and bite down on Wardo’s ear—hard—and lick the bruise. That’s when it’ll happen: Wardo’s mouth will fall open in a silent cry, neck stretched taught as Mark watches and watches and watches. It may take a while, but Eduardo will come back down with bright eyes and a smile and a thousand kisses.

He won’t let Mark pull off. Just a bit longer, he’ll say. My favorite place to be is inside of you. Mark won’t be able to argue with that. Their noses will press together and Mark will stay.


Mark’s eyes snap up from his laptop, staring angrily at the door, but making no move to open it. No matter what will happen later, right now there’s Mark and there’s Eduardo, and Mark is not going to be the one to close the gap.

“Mark!” Wardo yells again. Mark can see the shadow of his feet through the crack at the bottom of the door. “We’ve decided that you’re buying the beer from now on.  And ‘from now on’, we mean now. We’re all out.” Mark stares at his still unmatched socks hesitate and then pad away. “I’ll see you later, guys,” Mark hears him say, and then the opening and closing of a door marks his departure.  

Eduardo is still a dick. 

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